i don’t really have an aunt lilith.  i just liked the name.

i looked for you in the amber smoke-mist
i closed my eyes and looked for you
in the putrid budding of an already half-dead bloom
leaning no dying with the sweet stickiness of beauty
just like aunt lilith used to each chocolates
in her green velvet chair in the half-breath of night

you call me ugly and shout my name in curses and i am lost
whirling i hit my hard hopes and am shattered as sunlight
you are blinded and call me fool and love me
and speak to me your thoughts through red-colored eyes
dark and hard-rimmed with despair
just like aunt lilith used to eat chocolates
with her wispy grey hair and wispy grey intentions

life went by while we were eating a banana
repulsed by the brown little bruises
as aunt lilith used to eat chocolates
with her eyes far-seeing and her living hands steady

i looked for you today in the red cloud-dawn
of once again and never before and eternal ennui
i closed my eyes and looked for you
like aunt lilith used to eat chocolates
reading the words that weren’t there on her rose-covered walls

she liked the dark ones best