this was written just prior to my class.   not one of my favorites, but it shows where i started  my journey.

falling
on the hard edge of despair
so many bruises that bear your name
broken
into so so many halves
each separate part belonging to you
each drop of sweat your sweet candy
all my rotted limbs working for you
all my power given by you
it’s yours
fucking take it away
fucking use it
use me
fuck me
throw me
so i may not be the prime specimen
your romanticized soul had hoped for
but let me tell you
i’ve had enough
the deeper i fall the more you want
never at my best
my so fragile best
but you’ll find that with all my
pieces
all the twisted sick and gorgeous parts
control does not come so easy
and so i give you this
my very self
and watch to see what you’ll do with it
but do not put me together again
no
i will not let you erase your craft
too much of your pride
has gone into making me
exactly who and what i am
live with your own handiwork
i will not let you make me whole
no
not again